Wednesday, September 17, 2008

We Interupt You Regularly Scheduled Program...

So viewers today we are providing you with a special treat. We have brought to you a guest commentator.....J~sizzle (Justin for those not quite in the know) [Applause]

Ahem. Well hello, thanks for having me on. I thought today I would give our viewers a different take on the Johnson lifestyle. The last few months have been a roller coaster to say the least. I feel like the first guy that stepped into the ring with some guy name Cassius Clay. Punch after punch after punch. I won't rehash the whole saga of Detroit but lets suffice it to say that if Dante was alive today he would have started "As he journeyed into the first circle of purgatory he passed a curious sign, 'Welcome to Detroit'..." But even in the foulest mud sometimes a diamond exists. D-town had a few: 
1) We had a great ward and went through the temple together there.
2) Holy restaurant variety Batman. Seemed like there were a thousand choices 
3) Growing up. Funny thing you think that at this point we would have been adults. We had lived on our own for five years. I had finished two college degrees. But I have to say that Detroit was our forging fire. Chelsea and I reached (I think at least) the desirable place of becoming something special. We were a couple, sealed together for all eternity, but through it all we remained individuals as well. I see lots of people around who lose themselves as part of their marriage and family. I am not saying its a bad thing to be united with your spouse, but sometimes I want to shout "Think for yourself once in a while, you are not a robot". Anyways I digress 
4) The friends. We had great friends in Detroit. 
  Neil and Crystal, one of the most perfect couples. I finally found a cool nerd like me Prescotts/Olsens/Jorgensens, This was our family back there. All will be missed. 
Elliots: Who would have thought one of best friends would be an Englishman on the high side of 50. Top this off with his whole family being awesome and things worked out great. Coworkers/others: The other people that made everyday life just a little better. 

But alas they are all still trucking along as Detroit begins the encompass the third and fourth levels. Since we have moved back the the great 'Ho things have been mostly good sprinkled with incredible runs of misfortune. Take this streak for example: 
Friday: I am looking forward to the weekend. Had been saving my birthday money for a new game I wanted. I guess I just couldn't hold off and decided to get my present early. 
Yup a Speeding Ticket. In the 8 years I have lived away from here I have not gotten a single speeding ticket (besides freshman college, doesn't count). I have been back for about two months and what happens bam! I think cops here need more crime, I mean something to do.

Pretty good Weekend. 
Monday: Driving home from work, about a mile awayfrom home...thump thump thump.

A flat tire. Of all the rotten luck. $100 bucks down the pipe. O well, change the tire and get moving we are going to the park tonight for frisbee golf. So to end this run of three I lost my sunglasses at the park. Now this wasn't no Walmart pair, but a lovely pair of Maui Jims. Hopefully somebody finds and enjoys them and the lawnmower doesn't eat them.

So all of the events have made me take a step back a revaluate my life. I have came up with a list:
Things I Don't Like:
  1) Walmart. I mean in general I like it. But whenever you need that one particular item you think, 'I will go to walmart I mean they have 1,000,000 items right.' Wrong they only have 999,999 because they dont have the one you need.

2) Settling down. It kind of depresses me to think we might not move again. Even though I dislike moving (see item 3) the adventure is always so much fun. I think about being an Idaho Fallsian for a long time and it makes me sad. 

3) Moving: It seems like you can never find all your stuff again. If anyone sees my block cheese-grater please return it. It is pretty freaking hard to zest a lemon without it.

Things I am not sure about:
1) My job. I am not sure I really want to be an engineer. I really want to be a teacher but there is the unfortunate difference in pay. Wait! I have a great idea, it an election year we can cast votes for CHANGE. See #2

2) The presedential race. I can't seriously believe this is the best America has to offer. I don't know who to vote for. I like a few things about both canidates, but by enlarge I am disillusioned. I sort of like Palin (she is a vandle after all), but question if she makes up for McCain. I really like Obama's ideas until it comes to the whole 'pillage everyone who works hard so that people who don't can be better off' redistribution of wealth. If you are a billionair who worked hard for your fortune, good for you. If you are a crack mama who sniffs your welfare check, To D*mn bad that is a choice you made. Again I digress.

Things I really Like:
1) Idaho. Man I love this state. The mountains, outdoors, mostly nice people. Since Cheech and I got married we have lived in four states and two countries and this one is definitly my favorite.

2) My boys. The are a pain sometimes but man I love them. Sometimes I feel so young to be a dad. But i wouldn't trade those two for the whole world.

3) My wife. She is the best. Everyday she has to juggle so many things. Simply amazing.

I guess the best thing is that those last two things cancel everything else out. As long as thats here the rest doesn't really much matter. I am done ranting now, hopefully our loyal readers are not upset. I guess to sum things up, the Johnson's have never been better. We have taken our punches and am looking forward to round two...


The WIlloughby Family said...

I read this and I seriously was cracking up! I forgot how funny and witty Justin is. Thanks for the entertainment, I needed it after a long day of whining kids!

Jamie said...

Well done, Justin! I think you need to start your own blog!!

Celeste Adams said...

Thats one thing I don't mind about living in Michigan, cops don't seem to mind if you are speeding. They have PLENTY of other things to worry about! We just decided we can't watch the news because we get freaked out. I love the blog entry. Your hilarious, Justin! We wish you guys lived in Michigan with us!

WesnKt said...

it was great to hear from you on our blog! thanks for keeping in touch. wes has been out of school for a few semesters. he took off summer to start looking for a new job just incase ford laid him off with all of their cuts on 8/1. he then took off fall to help me with zoe during the last few months of my pregnancy with the twins. we are super bummed about their cutting back of stap, so i don't know if he will go back. in the meantime, he found a position with a bank ford is opening in SLC! can you believe it? they will pay for us to move home & we should be there by christmas! crazy crazy life. perhaps we can all have a reunion when we get back out west!
best wishes with your nice new house & life in idaho!
katie & co.

taylia said...

I have never laughed so hard in all my life! I can barely wait to share it with Jeff. Forget engineering and teaching go with the writing!!!! We sure miss you guys-especially on game night...old maid just isn't settlers!!!!!

Ami said...

Justin, We miss you! This is too funny. Hope this week is better. We had all the kids down at the driving range on friday. You would have been impressed.